


In for a penny ....

by RedStarFiction



Category: Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-23
Updated: 2015-11-26
Packaged: 2018-05-03 01:58:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5272295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedStarFiction/pseuds/RedStarFiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An extended piece post WIMOHB surrounding William and his relationship with his family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It had taken all of John Grey’s persuasion and a mixture of guilt, threats and blackmail but William had finally agreed to go to Frasers Ridge to check on the family and ensure they were in good health and not in need of assistance.   
“Claire was shot Willie! She could be suffering terribly with belated complications of the wound and how am I to help her if I do not know about it?”  
That was the line that had finally compelled William to do as his father wished.   
*  
William arrived at the homestead mid-morning and had been greeted by several barking dogs.  
*So much for the element of surprise.*   
He thought irritably to himself, if the sight of the giant, red-headed son-of-a-whore who had built the house proved too unsavoury to tolerate he would have liked to be able to turn around and leave without notice.  
*Grandson-of-a-whore*  
A little voice inside his head quipped and William felt his face flame. He dismounted and stomped past the dogs that seemed more intent on playing than protecting the home.  
*Incompetent fool. Can’t even train a dog!*  
The door opened and a black haired man stood appraising him from the threshold.   
“Hello. How can I help ye?”  
The man’s accent was Scottish but not the deep burr of his … Mr Fraser’s. The black haired man was tall and well-built but didn’t much resemble Fraser in any other way.  
“Good morning, I am here to see Mrs Claire …”  
William stopped, his mouth half open and realised he didn’t know which name Claire went by. The rational part of his brain knew it had to be ‘Fraser’, she had chosen to go back with the man and so could hardly remain as Lady Grey but still …  
The man at the threshold shielded his eyes from the glare of the sun and his face undertook a dramatic change of expressions. Shock, confusion and realisation all preceded a deliberately blank countenance. William clenched his fists by his side and took a deep breath.  
“Do the Fraser’s live here?”  
“Aye. They do. Ye had best come in William.”  
William closed his eyes and Roger realised what he had just said. The young man had offered no introduction and Roger had made it plain that he recognised him on sight.   
“Er…please. Come in. Coffee?”  
“Thank you.”  
William said curtly, exhaling heavily through his nostrils in a way that made Roger cringe slightly with recognition.  
*  
William sat down at the table and Roger introduced himself properly and informed him that Jamie was out hunting with Brianna and Jem and Claire was in her surgery but would be out presently. William had pursed his lips at the thought of meeting Brianna again, now knowing his parentage and wondered briefly if she had recognised it in him when they last spoke.  
*Everyone else bloody does! Why shouldn’t she?*  
He scowled into his coffee and looking down noticed a small child sitting at his feet beneath the table.  
“Good day Miss …?”  
“Mackenzie!”  
Came the answer followed by a giggle. Roger grinned apologetically at William and fished his daughter out, sitting her on his lap.  
“I didna ken ye were under there!”  
“I was hiding.”  
Mandy said, smiling shyly at William  
“My daughter, Amanda.”  
“Mandy!”  
The little girl asserted, elbowing Roger indignantly. William smiled broadly at her.  
“Well there is no mistaking her grandmother!”   
Roger nodded, grateful for Mandy’s appearance as it lessened the tension between them  
“Aye. She’s feisty alright.”  
Mandy shifted on Roger’s lap and stared intently at William.   
“You look just like my Grandda.”  
She said, her eyes wide  
“MANDY!”  
Roger hissed causing her to look at him in confusion.  
“But Daddy, his beard is even the same colour!”  
Roger closed his eyes and hastily revised his opinion on the fortune of his daughter’s appearance.  
“A coincidence no doubt.”  
William answered gamely and produced a penny from his pocket, nodding to the chalk and slate on the table.  
“I’ll bet you a penny you can’t draw me though.”  
Mandy’s face lit up and she wriggled out of Roger’s grasp and seated herself at the table, brow furrowed in concentration.  
“I apologise for that. She speaks as plainly as her grandmother too.”  
Roger offered awkwardly   
William shrugged and took another sip of his drink.  
“Well she has saved us both from a stubborn pretence. That alone is worth a penny.”  
Roger smiled at him and raised his mug gratefully.  
“And some breakfast too, can I get ye some eggs? Toast?”  
“I don’t wish to put you to any bother …”  
Roger grinned at him and raised an eyebrow  
“Save us from a stubborn pretence, aye?”  
William looked momentarily taken aback but then smiled slightly, his lip quirking in an endearingly familiar way.  
“Yes. I am rather hungry. Thank you.”  
Roger nodded and turned to the stove as he heard Claire’s surgery door bang. Roger could hear her coming down the hall and went to call out to her but his voice caught in his throat.   
“Roger, I don’t suppose you could reach … WILLIE!”  
Claire exclaimed stepping into the room and as her step-son started to rise from his seat she dashed forward and enfolded him in an embarrassingly exuberant hug.  
“Your servant …”  
He began but Claire interrupted him  
“Oh it is so good to see you! You look well!”  
“As do you,”  
He smiled, his face softening as she gazed up at him. He had always liked Claire very much and her obvious affection for him was uplifting indeed.  
“I was tasked with ensuring you were alright but now I see that you are I should take my leave?”  
He hadn’t intended it to come out as a question but it did and Claire flapped it away, nudging him back into his seat.  
“Nonsense! Roger get Willie some breakfast.”  
She ordered and William laughed aloud. Telling a Lord (sort of) that he spoke nonsense and ordering a man of her house to cook? She really was a remarkable woman.  
“I want to hear everything that has been happening!”  
Claire demanded. William opened his mouth to begin only to be interrupted moments later  
“I did it! Can I have my penny please?”  
Mandy had come to stand beside her grandmothers chair, slate proudly clasped in her chubby hands.  
William looked between the two wild haired women before him and for the first time felt a glimmer of kinship with his other father.  
It must take some character to brace oneself against the might of such women.  
“Ah, very good.”  
He smiled, acknowledging the drawing, which looked like a smiling potato.  
He handed over the penny in exchange for the slate and Mandy’s mouth dropped open with shock.  
“I didn’t think it was very good at all Grannie.”  
She said turning to Claire and promptly scurried off in case William should change his mind.  
“I’m afraid you have just been conned.”  
Claire smiled guiltily.  
William thought of similar things he had done to his grandparents and the fact that the little girl was his niece hit him with such suddenness that he found himself once again blushing furiously.  
“Never mind.”  
He mumbled and buried his nose in his coffee mug.   
*


	2. Waiting is the hardest part.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The interlude between William's arrival and Jamie's.

William was mopping up the last of his eggs with another thick slice of bread when the dogs began barking again. Claire saw him hunch his shoulders and eyed him warily. She had enough experience of the Fraser temper to know when it was beginning to fray.  
“Roger, would you mind seeing who it is?”  
She asked brightly, Roger obligingly crossed to the door and stuck his head out  
“Germain and Fanny!”  
He called back, the relief palpable in his voice. Claire felt relieved too and at the same time annoyed with herself for it. Why on earth should she worry about Jamie coming home into his own house?   
“Fanny?”  
William was on his feet at once and rushed past Roger, a smile lighting his face. Claire crossed to the window and watched.  
“FRANCIS!”   
He called, dashing outside and seizing her, swinging her around in his joy. It was the most exuberant Claire had ever seen him be.   
“William!”  
Fanny beamed at him and wrapped her arms around his neck hugging tightly. As if remembering himself, he put her down and cleared his throat almost shyly.  
“You look exceedingly well Francis. I am delighted to see it.”  
The girl blushed daintily and offered a small courtesy. It was a sweet gesture and Claire felt her throat tighten slightly.  
At fourteen, though she looked to be about twelve, Fanny was already so much older than her years in so many ways that Claire had been worried that she would not know how to behave around men, concerned that she would either shrink away entirely or become overly familiar as an automatic defence. Watching her bob prettily and then resume her usual stance with confidence and ease was wholly reassuring.  
“What are you doing here William?”  
“Francis! Your speech! You speak so clearly now!”  
William exclaimed and she nodded happily  
“Claire helped me, she loosened my tongue.”  
Fanny beamed proudly and Claire smothered a laugh at the incredulous look on her step-son’s face.   
“It appears that is a talent she possess’ well and truly!”  
Germain had been hanging back but now he stepped forward, placing himself somewhat proprietorially between Fanny and William.  
“Your servant sir.”  
He said curtly, offering William the merest bow. William inclined his head. He was clearly wondering what Germain’s connection to the family was as he looked like neither Fraser nor Mackenzie and had a very odd French twang to his speech. His body language, however, was not foreign at all. William knew a fighting stance when he saw one.  
“Forgive me, I did not catch your name?”  
“I am Mr Fraser’s eldest grandson, Germain Alexander Claudel Mackenzie Fraser.”   
He offered and William nodded  
“Captain William Clarence Henry George Ransom, a pleasure … Sir.”  
William offered the ‘sir’ with a small smile that would have made many children blush and shy away but Germain was made of sterner stuff than that and sniffed, flaring his nostrils in a way that showed distain but could be passed off as a potential sneeze if necessary.  
“We once had a mule named Clarence.”  
He remarked and Fanny slapped his arm, hard.  
“Stop it Germain! William is my fw-iend.”  
She scolded him, her scowl deepening as she tripped over the last word. Germain’s eyes narrowed and Roger decided to intervene.  
“Enough Germain. Apologise to Captain Ransom and get yourself inside, ye can make a start on building the fires.”  
Germain gave Roger a similar look but held his tongue and turned to face William again  
“I apologise for any offence caused sir, my remark was ill timed and unfortunate due to the similarities between our mule and …”  
Roger didn’t let him finish, stepping forward and seizing his collar and all but dragging the boy towards the house.   
“I dinna ken what you were about to say to him, I don’t want to either, but I ken ye Grandda would have more than a wee word with ye should he ever hear ye speak to a guest like that.”  
He spoke firmly, invoking Jamie’s potential wrath to gain some traction with his nephew. Germain pursed his lips and met Roger’s gaze full on, he was not foolish enough to push his uncle into a temper but neither was he willing to admit he had been rude.  
“He shouldn’t be taking hold of Fanny like that.”  
Roger’s eyes lit with understanding and he sighed  
“It takes more than a pair of strong arms to woo a lass like Fanny, dinna fash about that. But it takes more than a smart mouth too.”   
“I’m not her suiter!”  
Germain blushed and Roger grinned   
“I never said ye were.”  
Claire had listened to the exchange from behind the door but now she stepped into the courtyard and smiled sweetly at Germain  
“Would you mind terribly starting the fires Germain? My back …”  
“Of course Grandmere! At once!”  
Germain swept and elaborate bow to Claire and marched inside, closing the door behind him.  
William had been hanging back with Fanny, watching Roger speak to the boy, torn between amusement at the child’s courage and irritation at his lack of respect; now he strode forward and matched Germain’s bow with one of his own.  
“I really should leave, I do not wish to be here when …”  
William paused, for all he despised Fraser he did not wish to wound Claire.  
“When darkness falls.”  
He offered and she nodded although her eyes clouded a little.   
“You would be more than welcome to stay the night, Brianna would be delighted to see you…”  
William looked down at his boots, he would have genuinely liked to speak with Brianna Mackenzie again, he had found her wonderful company before but now knowing that she was his sister … yes. He would have liked that very much, but staying to talk to Brianna meant possibly having to talk to Fraser and he would not do that. No matter how much he might want to.  
“Alas, I fear I cannot accept the hospitality of your house.”  
“Ye could stay with us?”  
Roger offered quietly, gesturing at the smaller house down the hill.   
“It would be our pleasure to host you and you may find the … altitude less imposing.”  
Roger felt like an idiot dancing around the issue at hand but William looked tempted and he pressed on  
“I would like for ye to meet my son, Jeremiah.”  
William took a deep breath and Claire noticed with a small start that the fingers of his left hand were drumming nervously against his leg.   
“Alright. Yes, I would like that and the altitude is less imposing.”  
William suddenly burst out and ran his hand tersely through his hair.   
“If it is not too much trouble I will take my rest with you … at THAT house … and leave in the morning.”  
Roger nodded and laid a gentle hand on William’s shoulder.  
“Of course, it is no trouble. Let me fetch Mandy and we’ll get you settled.”  
As Roger went to find his daughter, Claire and William stood in a slightly awkward silence.  
“I … I am sorry Claire. My presence must be …”  
He began falteringly, waving his hand to convey the words he couldn’t bring himself to say  
“Your presence is welcome, YOU are welcome William.”  
She said gently and placing a hand on his shoulder, she tiptoed and kissed his cheek. The broad cheekbones he had inherited from his father were covered in rough, red stubble and Claire sighed as she stepped back from him.  
“If you feel you can manage it, we would love for you to dine with us tonight.”  
William’s mouth quirked up at the corner  
“I doubt I will, but it is a kind offer. May I see how I feel later?”  
Claire nodded and then staggered as the small solid weight of her granddaughter slammed into her legs.   
“I’ll see you later Grannie. C’mon Will-yam.”  
Mandy grinned and releasing Claire she held out her hand to the tall stranger and towed him home.  
*  
Jamie, Bree and Jem had arrived home in the early afternoon and Claire had explained the events of the morning to Jamie, carefully excluding Germain’s part. Jamie had been delighted and yet visibly dismayed that William would not stay in their house. Now the waiting to see if his son would grant him an audience was taking its toll on his nerves, making him agitated and irritable, which in turn was taking its toll on Claire’s.  
“Do ye think he’ll come?”  
Jamie asked for the seventh time inside an hour and Claire pinched the bridge of her nose, striving for patience.  
“I truly don’t know Jamie. He might.”  
“And ye told him he is welcome?”  
“I did.”  
Claire confirmed and plucked the half-peeled potato from Jamie’s hand, he had been holding it for the last five minutes and it was not getting any more peeled. He barely registered that it had left his grasp, his fingers simply began drumming against his thigh instead.  
“Do ye think I should send Germain to go and check?”  
Claire thought about the exchange between the two earlier and grimaced  
“No I don’t, perhaps send Fanny instead.”  
“Why not Germain?”  
Jamie asked, brows furrowed.  
“They had a little altercation earlier over the propriety of William’s conduct with Fanny.”  
Jamie looked utterly scandalised at the thought of his adult son having any such interest in lass of fourteen and Claire couldn’t help but laugh.  
“Don’t worry, I think the impiety was all in Germain’s head. Still, he took umbrage to it and Roger had to prevent a brawl.”  
“I doubt it would have lasted long enough to be a brawl Sassenach.”  
Jamie said dryly, thinking of his slim built twelve year old grandson taking on his giant offspring.  
“True, but send Fanny anyway.”  
Claire shrugged and Jamie nodded, too preoccupied with his own thoughts to think too hard about Germain’s pugnacious behaviour.   
He stood and crossed toward the stairs to call out to the lass but then thought better of it and walked back to his chair, hurling himself into it restlessly.  
“I’ll gi’ it a bit longer.”  
He said, scowling into the hearth and picking up another potato from the sack. Claire watched him turn it over in his hands and saw his eyes dart to the huge old clock and braced herself for the infinite question that she knew was coming …  
“Do ye think he’ll come?”  
*


	3. To belong.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I would really like to thank everyone for the amazing responses to this piece. I am really enjoying writing it, in many ways it is starting to write itself and has gone in a completely different direction to where I originally intended. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter and thank you again for the kudos/comments and support.

If Brianna had been surprised when Roger had told her they had a guest for the night, she was completely floored when he told her who it was. Brianna was tugging off her boots outside the door and conducting a whispered interrogation on one leg and Roger was bent double trying to hear her through the veil of red hair. Both were aware that they looked ridiculous, but so was the situation.  
“Is he OK?”  
“I think so, he claims Lord John asked him to come and check in on Claire.”  
“From what Mama said of the last time he saw Da they are barely on speaking terms.”  
“Aye but he is still family – maybe he changed his mind?”  
“Where is he?”  
“Asleep in Jem’s bed.”  
“So he’ll speak to me but not Da?”  
“Aye that’s what I gather.”  
“Why?”  
“How should I know?!”  
Roger quipped straightening his back and groaning as it cracked. Brianna shot him a look but didn’t press him further.  
“Claire wants us to go for dinner – all of us.”  
Roger added pointedly as Brianna stepped past him into the house carrying her muddy boots.   
“And how the hell am I supposed to make that happen?”  
Bree snapped and Roger rolled his eyes at her, following her into the kitchen.  
“He only wants to talk to you Bree. No one is saying ye have to perform magic family healing!”  
Bree took a deep breath and nodded  
“I know, sorry. I don’t know why I’m so flustered.”  
“He’s your brother.”  
Roger shrugged   
“Yeah and now he knows it.”  
Bree muttered and Roger smiled, understanding.   
“Ye feel guilty that ye didn’t tell him last time you spoke?”  
He asked, plucking the boots out of her hand and laying them on the rags Bree had set out, drawing her to him in the same motion and letting her rest her head on his chest.  
“I do. I mean, I know I couldn’t have dumped it on him like that, but it still feels like I did a crappy thing by not telling him.”  
She huffed, wrapping her arms around Roger and drawing comfort from his presence.  
“I know, but ye did what ye could and now you have a second chance. This is a good thing Bree.”  
He offered gently and Brianna nodded against his shirt. They could hear Jem and Mandy outside, Mandy was trying to persuade Jem to carry her dolly on his shoulders and Jem was convincing her that Esmerelda would be happier on Mandy’s own shoulders.  
“Like Mam carries you, aye?”  
“No! You have to carry her like Daddy carries me.”  
“But…”  
“That’s what she wants!”  
Mandy insisted and Roger chuckled into his wife’s hair, kissing the top of her head. Bree smiled and pulled away from him sighing.   
“OK I’m going to go and wake him up. Wish me luck?”  
“Good luck.”  
Roger gave her a thumbs up and with a final kiss, stepped outside to rescue Jem from the duties of being an older brother.  
*  
Bree nudged the door open and looked at her brother, asleep on his back his hands folded neatly into his chest. He looked less like their father and more, she supposed, like his mother in his sleep. His face softened and his cat-like eyes became more doe-like, the lids heavy.   
*Okay, here goes.*  
Bree thought to herself and stepped into the room  
“William?”  
She reached out and gently shook his shoulder. He was a deeper sleeper than their father too.  
His eyes fluttered open and she smiled at him  
“Hi.”  
“Hello.”  
He whispered blearily and sat up on his elbows. Bree sat back to give him some space and collect his thoughts.  
“It’s good to see you William.”  
“You too Mrs Mackenzie”  
They eyed each other a little warily and Bree knew that the only way to break the ice was to hammer it, tact and delicacy would only thaw it a little.  
“Did you sleep well, brother?”  
She heard him catch his breath and his eyes narrowed. For a moment she wondered if she had made a terrible error of judgement. When he spoke it was slow and deliberate and his eyes never left her face  
“I did, thank you sister. Thank you for your hospitality.”  
Bree let out the breath she had been holding and impulsively threw her arms around him. William froze and then slowly, cautiously, returned her embrace.   
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I’m so sorry.”  
Bree choked and he was alarmed to realise she was crying, her tears hot on his neck. His arms instinctively tightened around her and he hoped that for now that would be good enough as he was completely lost for words.  
“Tell me what?”  
He asked tentatively when her body stopped shaking. Bree sat up wiping her nose on the back of her hand, an action that was so boyish William couldn’t help but grin.  
“That you are my brother. When we met before I should have told you…”  
“I wouldn’t have believed you, or I would have believed you and created a most dreadful scene. I made rather a mess when I found out.”  
He hunched his shoulders defensively – just like Jemmy did when he was caught out in some misbehaviour and Bree’s heart tugged.  
“Me too,”  
She confessed, grinning  
“I threw an iron poker through a window. A closed window.”   
She added and laughed at the incredulous look on William’s face.   
“What? Girls throw things too!”  
“Well, yes. My cousin, Dorothea … she is rather prone to a fit of temper but to the best of my knowledge she has never hurled a poker.”  
Bree laughed  
“Well I didn’t have a teapot to hand.”  
William bit his lip and looked out of the window of the small room, he could see Fraser’s house up the hill and scowled at it.  
“He did the same thing to you?”  
“The same thing?”  
“Sired you and ran.”  
The smile had completely left his face was replaced with a look of pure dislike. Bree shook her head,  
“It wasn’t like that, it wasn’t his fault.”  
“That seems to be a running theme of his life. He does these unforgivable things and people rally around assuring each other it wasn’t his fault.”  
Willie sneered and Bree stood up angrily.  
“You don’t know all of his life William, you have a right to be curious and a right to need some time to process all this but dismissing him as a bad man is not the answer.”  
“I am only curious as to why so many intelligent, wonderful people insist on tolerating him.”  
“Because he is a good man who has had a very difficult life, no one thinks he is perfect, least of all him!”  
“Your mother thinks he is perfect, or at least worth choosing over a lord!”  
“Mama loves him. And you of all people know that a title doesn’t mean everything!”  
Bree snapped and William glared at her, his face turning crimson. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.   
“I’m sorry, that was cruel.”  
“Maybe. But it was true.”  
William said bluntly. Bree heard him move past her and opened her eyes to see him bracing himself against the window sill.   
“I am sorry that he did the same thing to you.”  
He said softly and Bree sighed.  
“It wasn’t the same… Well. I suppose in many ways it was but not in the way you think.”  
She ran a hand over her face and shrugged irritably.  
“Listen little brother, I don’t know about you, but I could definitely use a drink to get through this conversation.”  
William turned to face her, his skin was still flushed but not the alarming shade it had been.  
“Actually, yes. Will your husband object to you drinking at this hour?”  
Bree snorted and rolled her eyes at him  
“I doubt it, but it wouldn’t bother me if he did.”  
William permitted himself a small smile at that.  
“Well at least there is can be no doubt as to who your mother is.”  
*  
Bree seated them both at the table and brought out a bottle of rather strong beer that she had been saving for teaching Jem and Mandy the basics of baseball.   
“Right, I’m an American and American’s drink beer.”  
She said firmly pouring William a mug.  
“How … inflammatory.”  
He frowned at her and she rolled her eyes.   
“I live in America, my children were born in America, we’re hardly going to call ourselves English.”  
“But as servants of the crown …”  
Bree held up her hands in submission  
“Ok, Ok …How about we tackle one difficult conversation at a time?”   
William nodded curtly but eyed her with a particularly annoying blend of disappointment and scorn which she took a deep swallow of beer to ignore.  
“OK, shoot. Ask whatever you want.”  
She offered spreading her hands and William didn’t hesitate  
“Why did he leave you and your mother? He clearly loves her.”  
Bree told him everything Claire had told her of the events surrounding her parents and Culloden. She changed the standing stones to a safe passage to France but beyond that, kept to the truth. By the time she was done William had his head in his hands and was looking utterly wretched. The sun had rolled across the sky and the twilight sparked streaks of red through his chestnut hair.   
“But if he had safe passage for you both why did he not follow?”  
“He couldn’t leave his men. He saw us both safe but he had a destiny to follow for himself and for them.”  
William sat quietly for a moment and then sat up and looked directly at Brianna.  
“That explains you and your mother, it does not explain me.”  
“What do you not understand about that?”  
“I DON’T BLOODY UNDERSTAND ANY OF IT!”  
William exploded before covering his mouth, as though physically holding the words in. When he was calmer he braced his elbows on the table and sighed.  
“Forgive me for raising my voice to you Brianna. But the I do not understand what passed between he and my mother. I do not even know if it was a rape…”  
“It was NOT a rape.”  
Bree said firmly, reaching out and gripping his hand hard.  
“I do not know the ins and outs of it all but I swear to you on my children that you are not the product of rape. Da … Jamie … he would never.”  
William swallowed and nodded   
“Alright, I believe you. But then what was it?”  
“I don’t know. Loneliness? Passion? What does it matter?”  
“It matters because it created a lie that I have lived with my entire life.”  
“No, it created your life. The lie was to protect you.”  
“Protect me? How…”  
Bree squeezed his hand, her nails digging into his wrist  
“Look at the life you have. Look at all the opportunities you have been given and the education you have had. Do you think you would have had any of that if Jamie had claimed you?”  
“But…”  
“No. Wait. You need to think about this William. What could he have offered you? In exile from his home, a convict and alleged traitor to the crown… you would have had nothing.”  
William pulled his arm away from her, scowling.  
“I wouldn’t have lived the first twenty years of my life in a lie. How can you think what he did is right?”  
“I don’t know if it is right or wrong. That wasn’t the question. The question was ‘why’ and you have the answer to that now.”  
Bree felt more than a little drunk but was relieved that the alcohol seemed to clear away the emotions and leave a cold, hard core of logic in her mind and she could cling to that. She hoped her brother was experiencing a similar sensation.  
“I would have liked to belong though.”  
He murmured and Bree leant forward, her face close to his own.  
“You did belong. You do belong.”  
William looked intently at her  
“Do I?”  
“Of course. Belonging is not just about one place. I belonged with my daddy, Frank. I loved him and he was a wonderful father. Then when Mama came back, I found I belonged with her and Da and then I married Roger and now I belong with him and the kids. We can belong in multiple ways and times little brother.”   
William sighed and smiled at her, a small sad smile  
“You sound just like him you know? I remember being very young and he would speak to me about things that others shielded me from and things that others thought unsuitable. I called him Mac. You know all this?”  
“I do.”  
Bree confirmed  
“But I still like to hear you tell it.”  
William leant back in his chair and stretched  
“Well…”  
There was a sudden rap at the door and Bree looked up at the clock. It was nearly seven. She heard the murmur of voices and then Roger stuck his head into the room  
“Fanny wants to know if we are going to the big house for supper?”  
“We are.”  
Bree answered firmly and gave William a look that brooked no arguments. He inhaled deeply through his nose but gave the tiniest of nods in answer.  
“Tell her we’ll be there in ten minutes.”  
Bree said and Roger retreated to relay the message.  
“Do I look presentable?”  
William asked stiffly and Bree snorted.  
“You look great. Now get your boots on, we’re going to see our father.”  
*


	4. When Mountains Collide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For now this is the final part of this series. I have run out of steam a little. I didn't initially intend for things to go this way but you know how these things are - characters have their own ideas! Thank you all for reading this far. You're brilliant!

Jamie opened the door and his breathe caught in his throat. His children, heads bowed together in conversation, were making their way up the slope towards him, to have dinner, like a proper family. He must have made a noise for Claire appeared wordlessly beside him, her arm linked through his, her fingers interlacing with his own.  
“Taing mhór Dhia. He came.”  
Jamie whispered and Claire squeezed his fingers in response. As they got closer it became apparent that they were swaying slightly and Jamie's eyebrows shot up.  
“Are they drunk?”  
“Probably a little. It will have been a trying afternoon.”  
Claire reasoned and Jamie shot her a side-long glance.   
“Weel I ken where Brianna gets her liking for the bottle in times of duress but Willie …”  
Claire elbowed him playfully in the ribs  
“If they both do it then the common denominator is not me!”  
She retorted and Jamie snorted.  
“Aye Sassenach, I ken weel enough that many a bad habit has stems from me, I just didna think I had to take responsibility for that one too.”  
Claire smiled and planted a hasty kiss on his cheek as Bree finally made it to the door, her brother in tow.  
“Hi Da,”  
She smiled and kissed Jamie’s other cheek. Jamie ushered her in, squeezing her hands briefly in his own in thanks, before turning his attention to his son. William stepped aside to let Jem and Roger, who was carrying Mandy, enter the house, feigning an issue with his boots laces. As they passed Mandy held her arms out sleepily to Jamie and he obligingly took her from her father.   
“Aye mo chridhe, come to Grandda then.”  
He murmured as the little girl settled her head on his shoulder, eyeing William drowsily.  
“Grandda?”  
“Mmmm?”  
“I like Will-yam.”   
She declared and offered her uncle a favourable smile.  
“Ye do? Weel good; so do I.”  
Jamie spoke softly, just loud enough for William to hear and he saw his son pause in his exaggerated efforts with a knot in his boot laces.  
Jamie stooped to set her down, ignoring her small protests as he untangled her hands from his hair.  
“Go on and sit wi’ Grannie, ye dinna wish Jem to get all the best corn do ye?”  
Mandy seemed to perk up at the thought of buttered corn on the cob and hurried over to the table, tiredness forgotten.   
William finally loosened the knot and as it unravelled so did his excuse to avoid Jamie’s watchful gaze.  
“Thank you for the invitation, Sir. It is my pleasure to be in your home and I am your most humble servant.”  
He said, directing his eyes somewhere above Jamie’s left shoulder.   
“Ye’re welcome; it is my pleasure to have ye here.”  
Jamie's voice sounded strange even to his own ears, slightly strangled and a little higher than usual. He could feel his ears burning, embarrassed by it.   
William ducked his head awkwardly. He had arrived this morning hating Fraser, the sort of studied hatred that comes from obsessive thought, and yet now, face to face with the man he felt absurdly close to tears.   
Get a grip Ransom!  
He scolded himself and made an effort to draw himself up to his full height, noticing with a flash of irritation that Fraser was still slightly taller.   
“Please, William, do come in.”  
Claire gently steered Jamie aside and William gratefully took a seat opposite Roger, next to Mandy who seemed thrilled that he had chosen to sit next to her.   
“You can reach the potatoes for me and I'll reach the meat for you.”  
She beamed at him and patted his hand gently.  
“I am sure that shall be a great help.”  
William spoke kindly and glanced down the table at all present. Roger sat beside Germain, then there was Fanny, and Claire at the end of the table one end. On his side sat Jeremiah, Brianna, Mandy, himself and then Jamie at the head of the table.  
There was a general hub-bub as the food was passed around and plated, Mandy taking up most of his attention. William had not thought it would be possible but the truth was he was thoroughly enjoying himself. He felt comfortable amongst these people, although he said very little to Jamie he found Roger to be a good conversationalist and he seemed more than happy to act as a sort of bridge for conversation between William and Jamie, blending the seams of their chat easily.  
Dinners had not been sombre affairs growing up but being an only child and his Papa and Isobel not having vast numbers of immediate family living near them, he had not really experienced a family meal such as this very often.   
Jamie himself was almost completely overwhelmed with joy at having both of his children together at the same table. He found himself studying his son and tried to be as discreet as possible but it was intoxicating to see him and Brianna together. Their similarities and their differences shone out through expression of face and language but their humour seemed well matched and he heard William's true laugh for the first time in fifteen years. A high, clear sound that Jamie knew was all Geneva and his heart ached for the loss of her life, for the fact that she never got to meet their son, that Willie never knew her.  
He understood the lads reluctance to be near him and did not doubt that if it had not been for Brianna and her powers of persuasion William would not be here. He looked at his daughter, her face flushed with drink and laughter at something William had said. Whatever he had done to deserve this moment, he was glad of it.  
He offered a silent prayer and blinked away the moisture that had gathered at the corners of his eyes.  
With dinner over, Brianna and Claire ushered the children upstairs whilst Jamie retrieved a bottle of whiskey from above the fireplace and then lead the men through to his study.  
Roger stretched his legs out and grinned at William.  
“I fear my daughter may be besotted with ye.”  
“Oh well, I assure you the feeling is mutual!”  
William beamed and accepted the glass Jamie offered him, momentarily turning his smile to his father, something he had not purposefully done yet.   
“She is remarkable – So bold!”  
“Aye she is that.”  
Jamie smiled, his face flushed with pride. William nodded to him and raised his glass  
“You have a wonderful family.”  
“They're your family too lad.”  
Jamie said softly. In the silence that followed Roger cleared his throat and stood up.   
“I need to get some air. Good night gentlemen.”  
“You're leaving?”  
William sounded almost panicked and Roger smiled at him  
“Aye, ye have a lot to catch up on. I'll leave ye be.”  
Biting his lip, William nodded, slightly embarrassed at how childish he had sounded.  
Jamie stood and shook Roger's hand, trying to convey his gratitude discreetly through the pressure of his fingers. Roger clasped his shoulder, squeezing tightly before taking his leave.  
Jamie waited until the door clicked shut behind his son-in-law and then took the vacant seat beside William.  
“I ken it was not easy for ye to come here and I would like to thank ye for it.”  
“It was nothing. Lord John asked me to ...”  
“Aye, but ye didna have to, so thank ye.”  
Jamie interrupted and ran a hand through his hair.  
“If there is anything ye wish to ask me William...”  
He sat back in a practised nonchalant stance that was at once open and defensive, allowing his son a sense of a barrier between them that he could either maintain or break down at his will.   
“Last time I asked you what passed between you and my mother you refused to tell me...”  
William began and Jamie nodded  
“Aye, and I stand by that.”  
Jamie said firmly but William waved his protest away impatiently.  
“I know but I would like to know if … I mean ... was it love?”   
Jamie rubbed the bridge of his nose and thought for a moment.   
“No, it wasna love. We... Ye ken ye mother was due to marry the lord?”  
“Yes.”  
“It was a good match but I dinna think she wanted the marriage and I was a … distraction for her. We comforted each other and ye are the result.”  
“Brianna tells me it could not have been rape.”  
William offered it as a statement but Jamie saw him clutch the glass a little tighter, the skin of his knuckles turning pale.   
“It was not a rape. I have ne'er forced mysel' on an unwilling lass and the men that do should suffer a slow an' painful death.”  
Jamie spoke slowly, deliberately and held William's eyes as he said it. He knew what went of in the barracks of soldiers and he had seen enough brothel waiting rooms to know how they could treat whores. He hoped his son was a better man but would not mince his words around it.  
“I happen to agree.”  
William said stiffly, angry with himself for wanting to prove himself to the man before him. He knocked back the rest of his drink and topped himself up from the decanter on the table. The air between them was heavy with words that neither could speak and years of separation that they could not find a way to bridge.  
“Good.”  
Jamie said finally and sipped his own drink. He raised his eyebrows  
“Is there anything else?”  
“The language you and Brianna were exchanging jokes in. Was it Gaelic?”  
“Aye the Gadhlig. I did teach ye a few words once.”  
William felt his throat contract and had to force his voice past his strangled cords.  
“Before you left.”  
He said flatly.  
“Aye.”  
Jamie looked so sad but if anything it only made the hot fire of anger that was burning William's stomach burn brighter. He had no right to that sorrow, he had chosen it after all, William had no say in the matter. He remembered being held in his aunt Isobel's arms as he sobbed inconsolably for Mac, his friend ... his bloody father! Shit! William realised that the fire in his belly was at least partly due to the whiskey threatening to make a re-appearance and he stood abruptly  
“I need to go outside.”  
He said curtly and all but ran from the room.   
Jamie caught up with him around the side of the house and waited patiently for his son to stop retching.   
“Alright?”  
“Do I bloody look alright?”  
William snapped and Jamie clicked his tongue against his teeth impatiently. William turned to scowl at him but lost his balance on the cold ground and almost fell. Jamie reached out and caught his arm, hauling upwards.   
“Don’t bloody touch me!”  
William wrenched his arm from Jamie's grip, his voice beginning to shake alarmingly; was he about to start crying?!   
“Please, leave me alone.”  
William whispered over his shoulder.  
“No.”  
Jamie's voice was firm and William pressed the back of his hand against his mouth.   
“Why not? You left me before.”  
He could hear the tremor of self-pity in his speech now, how his voice rose and fell like a child fighting back tears from being told no.  
“Aye, and it was one of the hardest things I've ever done, but it was right.”  
William turned to face him, his features contorted with rage.  
“Right?! You could have given me a home! You could have given me a father.”  
“You had a father figure.”  
“IT'S NOT THE SAME!”  
William roared. His teeth began to chatter and Jamie wordlessly took his own coat off, holding it out to the younger man.   
“Say something damn you!”  
William slapped his hand away and Jamie felt his patience slipping.  
“What do ye want me to say? That I am sorry I didna claim ye? Sorry for no’ taking ye wi’ me?”  
“YES!”  
“WELL I’M NOT!”  
Jamie shouted back at him, his chest heaving.   
“I couldna gi’ ye anything. No’ even a home. I stayed until the resemblance became a threat to ye but then I had no choice but to go.”  
“A threat to me? To you more like! A convict rutting with some poor girl who probably didn’t know what she was getting into...”  
“William...”  
“... and then you got her pregnant. I bet you wish you kept it in your breeks then.”  
“I'm warning ye lad...”  
“And what of John Grey? What did you know of him? To trust him with your child?”  
William spat at him. Jamie struggled to keep his voice level as he fought back his own rage.  
“I ken enough about him to trust him.”  
“You're a bloody careless fool!”  
“ENOUGH!”   
Jamie roared, his fists clenched and shaking at his sides with the effort of not striking his son. William took an involuntary step back. He was not used to being confronted with a temper that could match his own.   
“Whether ye like it or no’ I am ye father and ye will keep a civil tongue in ye head.”  
Jamie's voice was dangerously low, his temper still too high to think properly.   
“Do not presume to tell me how to speak, sir!”  
William ordered and the little control Jamie had broke.  
“Then dinna speak like a spoilt wee bastard…”  
Jamie bit the word off and clamped his lips shut. He had made the exact same faux par fifteen years earlier in a stable on the eve of losing his son and now he was doing it again.   
Ye are a careless fool Fraser  
He thought furious with himself. He saw a blur coming towards his face and William's fist caught him on the chin as he jerked backwards, it was only a glancing blow but enough to assure Jamie of the power in those fists. He wouldn’t fight his son, but he wouldn’t tolerate a beating from him either.  
Circling the boy, he threw his coat over William, covering his face and held on as the lad flailed. Had William been sober Jamie knew he would never have stood a chance, but as is so often the case, especially where drink is involved, age and treachery out won youth and skill. Unable to see Jamie, William swung wildly and Jamie simply placed a foot behind the boy’s ankle and tripped him to the floor, landing him on his arse.   
William dragged the coat off of his head and glared at Jamie for a second before his face crumpled and he rested his head on his knees.  
“It's like looking into a damn mirror. I can't even look at you.”  
Jamie heard his voice crack and let him cry it out for a minute and then sat on the ground beside him. He put an arm around the younger man's shoulders and William shook him off.  
“I'm fine!”  
“Dinna be an idiot.”  
Jamie scoffed and William didn’t resist as Jamie gathered him into his arms and held him close.  
“I was never be sorry for ye bein’ in the world lad. Ye are everythin’ I could ever dared hope for in a son, my heart swells wi’ pride when I think of ye and I do think of ye, verra often. But as to the hurt I ha' caused ye, for that I am truly sorry. I did what I thought was best and I may ha' been wrong but I tried.”  
Jamie pressed a kiss to his sons head and tipped his chin up, forcing him to look Jamie in the eye.  
“Why are you saying those things? I'm just your bastard. What Claire must think ...”  
“No man can be measured by the circumstances of his birth, Claire kens that as well as any one.”  
Jamie smiled at the thought of his practical and frequently outrageous wife.  
“I love ye, I loved ye from the moment ye were born and nothin’ could ever change that. Ye are my son.”  
With that Jamie stood up and dusted his breeks off.  
“Should ye wish to come back to the house, I would like ye to. If ye canna do that I understand but the offer is always open. Always.”  
He said softly and William nodded, wiping his face on his shirt sleeve. Jamie's heart burned with longing to seize him and clutch him to his chest and smooth away as much of the hurt as he could, but forced himself to turn back to the house. He wouldn't hurt the lads pride further.  
“Wait.”  
William climbed shakily to his feet  
“If you don't mind, I would rather like to get to know my father properly.”  
Jamie strode towards him so quickly, William flinched expecting a blow but Jamie only grabbed his arms, pulling William hard against him the way he should have done years before, enfolding him in his arms and allowing the tears to flow unchecked down his face.   
“Thank ye.”


End file.
